There was a time in my life where the thought of being isolated from other people really bothered me. I couldn’t go anywhere without a person driving me to a destination or following me down one of the forest paths. I think this fear stems from when I was a child and I was in constant contact with my dad. He was very sickly and I was usually taking care of him. It’s a hard burden to put on a child. No kid should ever have to be a nurse for their parent, but it happens and I’m here now. This fear of being alone, without the constant chatter or noise really haunted me throughout life.
I’m struggling to find friends my own age who live close by and have similar interests. I live in a gorgeous rural area, however, a lot of folks really are quite freaked out by the term “witch.” I’ve tried to make friends who are non-Pagans, however, I find it quite hard to relate to them. There’s nothing wrong with how they are living their life, it’s just seems kind of boring to me.
I want friends I can visit graveyards with or who love to go looking for animal bones in the forest. I miss having friends who enjoy going on long drives and exploring what lies beyond the next hill.
There is some bright light to this story, however.
In the midst of finding out how few people exist out there who will hang out with me and practice Magick, I have discovered the wonder of being alone.
There is true Magick in being able to be in isolation and find comfort in your own company. It’s also empowering to not “put up with” people who are toxic or unfriendly just because I’m lonely. There’s a freedom I have never known in just hanging out with myself.
Sure, there’s times when I go to Pagan gatherings and see my far away friends – but mostly? It’s just me.