He rises through me, passing through my teeth like gravel
Bile from my center, the fear rising to meet You
I’m suddenly caught off guard by Your advances
Spitting out the boney shards, unfocused
I am taken over by the Desire
Drunk on rusty, honey mead, lapping from Your chalice
I refused You once, but no more
Entering the twisted, spiral Grotto
Stumbling blindly through a liminal maze of secrets
The dead, rising up like the Past, whispers of memories I’d like to forget
Bashing my head on the low hanging presence of regret
Chased by a Minotaur of future Vision
My eye drying up like the river before us
You urged me into the boat, like Charon
The waves crashing at our vessel as good men work above
We’re off course, dearest Wotan
No angular stone to guide us through the storm
The sun is lost to us now, Odin
We sink into the fissure created by pesky, impulsive actions
We’re beyond teardrops now, furious at ourselves
Gasping for air, You & I, Grasping
Strangling each other for comfort
Swinging from the Hangman’s knot
We’re the Fools & The Magicians
Working for the Star
Upside down, ALGIZ
Reaching for the Balance of Dagaz, the Day
Grinning into our Twin Mirrors – the Window of the Soulless
I reached for You, You reached for the Light
The torch burned me when I sought Sanctuary
On that Moonless Mabon night
You gaped at my naivety, perfect Love & Trust
Oscillating between the worlds, on that Old Apple tree
When I cried for Your help I thought You abandoned me, Berserker
You showed me a sideways mirror when You were nowhere to be found
Rightly so. I stared into the reflection of a broken little girl.
I could remain here, bound by Your disbelief
But You didn’t shed a Tyr
Broken & distorted from the perception of Your words
I could give up; Succumb to the poison from Your perfect lips
Or entertain the Circus of Your thoughts
My friends, the wolves, will emerge soon from the furrow
Giving my flesh a clean shave & collecting on old debts
I can finally breathe now – having shed You from my core
At the Crossroads – my own thoughts return in a cluster
Now bound in a jar, buried but not forgotten
As I turn from that place, to leave the silent crushing behind
I hear You murmur
Need a good laugh?
So do I, All-Father.
Let’s dance! Let’s battle once more! Let’s get giddy on moonlight!
Life is more than laughter, peace, & unrequited love
It is the lessons from trauma You’ve awakened
What weapons we have forged, Odin?
There are no more victims in us, no more survivors
Only masters. Let’s be the unseen manifestation!
Now, take my hand, my ring, my words – AND SWING!