This weekend was beyond anything I had ever experienced at Deeply Rooted in the six years I have been a member of that community. As the leaves begin their fiery bursts of orange and reds and the wind nips playfully at my cheeks, I am reminded of the turning of the Wheel of the Year. We are staring down the barrel of Mabon – a celebration of harvest and for me, a sacred time that represents my renewed commitment to Paganism as a whole and my own personal spiritual structure. Deeply Rooted has been so much a corner stone, a foundation if you will, of that change within me that I can not begin to put into words my everlasting gratitude and utmost respect for the land and the people that have committed themselves to its protection and operation.
When I was in the midst of doing spiritual work over the weekend, I thought a lot about my entire spiritual life up to and including recent events. I felt a sense of happiness that in the pain and suffering of the last year, my understanding of the Gods, Voodoo, mantras, and so many other spiritual dealings rose! It’s been a good year for that alone. I am blessed double by the mountains of support from people who are my Tribe. People that have worked hard to guide me spiritually and given me a sense of contentment and safety when the world around me felt very dark. The tribe that stood by me countless times and awakened a sense of purpose within my being. I can now take that sense of purpose of move forward to a future I could not have imagined a few years ago. Gods and Nature please hear my thanks!
Over the weekend at Deeply Rooted, I spent hours with smudge stick in hand, walking the grounds and visualizing the kind of community that I’d like to see. I did this with reverence for the spirit beings, the land, the Gods and also the community that shares these grounds. My visualizations included the thoughts given to me by others that are outside my own needs, however, have a deep meaning to the ones who expressed them to me over these last few months. I buried eggs in the woods as a way of “giving” to the sacred land. I adorned our shrines with rose petals, lavender, cinnamon and other sacred herbs as a way of me showing respect for the entirety of Deeply Rooted. I whispered to trees, rocks and to the winds as I made my way through the wettened wood.
I called to Grandmother Apple, ancestors of Deeply Rooted, my own ancestors, the Faerie Kingdom and also to Grandmother Bear. I see Her as a sacred and protective creature of the wood. At the apex of my workings on Sunday morning by Grandmother Apple shrine, a bear did indeed visit me! I heard the grunting and the foot falls behind me as the bear circled the shrine. I kept my cool and acknowledged in my spirit that I saw Her and that She had nothing to fear from me. I was here to honor Her. She left me and while I would not recommend the same actions from anyone else for safety sake, I am glad I was given audience by this kindred spirit. Our encounter was chance and in no way did I bait Her because that is a very dangerous practice.
I have been seeing images of Kamadhenu in my mind as I walked around DR over the weekend. She is the sacred “wish giving” bovine Goddess/spirit / Devi of India. You have seen Her as a white cow. I found Her statue in Goodwill and She is now sitting upon my altar. Goodwill in Marshfield where Indian deities are rare. I was floored to find Her in such a way and did some research before placing Her among the other spirits of Mother India. I am not a Hindu in the classic sense nor do I have the understanding that growing up in that culture would afford me however I feel a kinship with certain aspects that is unmatched.
Yesterday I did a ritual with Pan, carnal Lord of the forests and beasts. I was in the woods behind the house in Medford when I made a pact with the Forest Lord. As soon as I came back from my forest stroll, there was a huge storm that erupted behind me. I didn’t feel threatened, I felt in awe. It looked as if a HUGE GOD was coming through the trees and making them sway and dance. I did not run into the house. I stayed and stared, letting the rain drop around me and cleanse me. I got very much the feeling that Pan had accepted my offer and would help me. I had, in the past, run screaming from storms like that because I was not looking at them with the eyes of a Pagan.
What’s odd is that when I had appealed to Pan, I had specifically stated that I had wishes that needed to be fulfilled for me to function. They are indeed somewhat selfish wishes however I believe that selfish wishes have their place. I am offering a sacred trust and bond to a deity and expecting no more in return than the commitment that I have given. That’s reciprocal and Gods often have a way of granting those wishes if we are sincere when we have thought them out and expressed them. Finding Kamadhenu in the Goodwill was rather intense of a find for me because I felt Pan had guided me to Her. Lord of the Beasts and Forests introducing me to The Sacred Beast.
Last night I had a dream that involved many people that I know. I was in a giant city being guided by Tyr. Tyr looked like the Norse version of Tyr until He turned to His side and faced away from me and He looked like a Native American man. He was dark haired, beautiful tan skin and the features of a Native person who was clad in light buckskin. I got a distinct feeling that He was more than one God leading me in the dream. Some one even said in passing, “This is the Native Tyr and He is coming to you in a form you understand.”
Kamadhenu was also guiding me in the dream. Her huge brown eyes brought me to places around the city. In each instance, I would visit a place in this city that looked very much like Deeply Rooted. Sometimes it was a faerie glen within the middle of a large retail book store. Every path I took in the city lead me back to a specific group of people that are familiar to me. One such person was a repeated theme and even a guide through some of the “scarier” parts of the dream that involved being lost in a large crowd of people and being trapped in a subway that opened up into a river as I walked down the tracks to a hidden path. Following that river, I emerged from the city and back to the group of people that kept reoccurring. I felt like the dream went on for many hours even though I know most dreams take place only in the course of a few minutes.
Kamadhenu lead me to a scrap yard in this city where I was taken to buy “parts” to help repair some machine. All of the parts were in the neat little plastic bags that automotive part stores wrap such goodies as o-rings, gaskets, and sealants. When I left the store, I was lead to a park where rusted geese lay dying on the ground. I repaired these mechanical geese only to see them shed their sooty black feathers and spring forward as real, living creatures. I am blessed to witness such imagery in my mind.
And so, that’s how I am going to “start” this week. These spiritual beings and mindset that are forever leading me down new paths and back to the same group of people – and the place that we gather – Deeply Rooted. I send you all blessings of light and love and ask you all to look within yourselves as the cool weather hits and we are again inside, facing each other in the long winter months. Let our ideas form into seeds to bring plenty not only to our own lives but to each other. An idea from a person who only had magickal connections to machinery that now extends into nature – the deep roots of longing and purpose of the land we encounter at Deeply Rooted.
Goddess be with you all.